EMERGENCY CONTACT

For non-urgent issues, please call our automated answering machine at 1-800-I-DEAL-WITH-IT.

For actual emergencies, please hold for 5 minutes while we try to find our manager, who's probably in a meeting.

I lost my cat. It's probably in my neighbor's house. I need a ride because my car is in the shop, and I think I might be in a parallel universe. Other Issues

Disclaimer: We're not really sure what we do here. Maybe just stare at this page for a bit.